Look, I get that you have no problem being naked while you go about your obsessively intricate pre- and post-workout routine. Whereas most of us consider nudity to be a transitional state between clothed and unclothed, for you it is obviously something a bit more, a relaxing part of your day when you can let everything swing free and that you look forward the way I do to grabbing a beer and firing up the Xbox.
But please, for the love of all that’s holy, stop doing your convoluted naked stretching routines and workouts in the steam room. When you’re in a room about the size of a hatbox filled with a) three other people and b) hot, vaporized water through which we all can still see, it is impossible for you to grab your toes and show your ass like a cat in heat without getting your junk all up in someone else’s business. This tiny little room is not the appropriate place for you to plop down on your back with your head three inches from my thigh and start doing Village People hip thrusts at the tiled ceiling.
Hell, the place could be the size of a Versailles ballroom and it still wouldn’t be the appropriate place.
Please, enjoy your god-given nakedness, but remember that there is a time and a place -- neither of which is in the confines of a steamy room where some of us with serious personal-space issues are trying to relax for a few minutes in peace.
Also, if it’s not too much trouble, would you mind not standing completely starkers with your foot up on the sink counter clipping your toenails? Thanks much.
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